Recovery

This past week I had to have a surgery to improve my quality of life. But with a surgery comes recovery. All surgery recoveries differ one to another and I will be down six to eight weeks. Hearing that and accepting this has been the hardest thing. I am not the type of person who wants to sit at home and do nothing.

In weeks leading up to the surgery I did come up with a list of things I can do from home. I can work on completing my training hours required for being a CASA. I can look up more recipes to try. I can work on my son’s senior year things. I can make my summer outside wreath for my new porch.

Even with all these things to try to keep me ‘busy’ it doesn’t stop my mind from racing thinking about our youngest child’s senior year. I know this is mom guilt for sure. Missing some of their sport events has been eating at me. When they left this weekend to go to an event they gave me a hug. Said I love you to them and they said it back. I could hear the sadness. It pulled at my heart.

We got our children when they were in the 8th and 10th grade. The youngest attached to me very quickly, they wanted me at all their events no matter what it was. I told them I would try my very best to be at as many as possible. I hadn’t missed any til this surgery. They had told me it’s ok, you won’t miss my entire senior year just a few games. Even with their reassurance it has still been difficult sitting here knowing they are participating without anyone cheering them on.

Being a mom in this day and age is so difficult. There are so many unnecessary pressures, from ourselves and others. We need to give ourselves a break! Our children know we love them, they know we will show up for them in the most difficult parts of their life. Moms, it is okay to take time to recover from whatever we need recovery from. Just rest.